May Is The Hectic-est Month: Personal & NaPoWriMo Update

Hey, everyone.

So I haven’t been great at updating this blog lately. I was trying to avoid doing a State Of The Blog post so early in the game, but since I had promised to do a poem a day and was clearly not delivering, I figured I’d better explain why.

So, first off, I have been writing poetry. It hasn’t been a poem a day, but it’s been greater output than in previous months. A lot of it has been in my handwritten journals, so typing it up has been an obstacle (especially with WordPress formatting to contend with). So my plan currently is to return to my regular update schedule of Tuesday Personal Blog and Friday Poem starting next week, and thus I’ll catch people up on my NaPoWriMo poems in that way.

Things getting in the way of me blogging have been:

  1. Busy family weekends galore (60th birthday! Russian Music Festival! ETC!)
  2. Needing to help siblings with their kids gets in the way of getting stuff done on the computer
  3. A lot of self-hatred has come up out of nowhere. I’m dealing with it through therapy & journalling, but it has made it hard to get things done that I want to get done.
  4. Events in Manhattan or Brooklyn when I live in Staten Island = tons of extra travelling which leads to much less computer time

So these are all just excuses. I get that. But part of getting better is trying and falling down and trying again. I failed in a daily-update schedule, but I’m glad I made the commitment to do that, even though I fell down in the first week or two. Because the attempt itself was worthwhile.

I’m going to go back to my regular update schedule mentioned above and see how that works. I have a feeling that I’ll feel a whole lot better about that commitment.

NaPoWriMo2015 Poem 9: Complaint

 
Complaint

The sardine
is too salty & lean.
The calf
is too bland by half.
The kale
makes me quail.
The quail,
in turn, is rather pale.
I may be too picky,
But I won’t eat things that are sticky
or slimy or tough
or spiny or rough,
or if the touch, taste, or smell
makes me feel unwell.
I don’t care if it’s rude,
I’m NOT eating your food.
 
 
 
 
 
 
About This Poem
I’m not sure where this came…

View On WordPress

NaPoWriMo2015 Poem 9: Complaint

 
Complaint

The sardine
is too salty & lean.
The calf
is too bland by half.
The kale
makes me quail.
The quail,
in turn, is rather pale.
I may be too picky,
But I won’t eat things that are sticky
or slimy or tough
or spiny or rough,
or if the touch, taste, or smell
makes me feel unwell.
I don’t care if it’s rude,
I’m NOT eating your food.
 
 
 
 
 
 
About This Poem
I’m not sure where this came from, but I actually kind of like it! It’s pretty silly. Maybe a little Learian? Or is that too cocky of me to say? Critique, as always is welcome. 🙂

NaPoWriMo2015 Poem 8: I’m Not Here

CN: self-deprecation, dreadful self-esteem, negative self-talk, whatever you want to call it.

I’m Not Here

Dull as dirt & with less life
Lazy, lazy, ill at ease
Striving, failing, full of strife
& of Pyrrhic victories

I’m not in, I’ll be anon,
Say I when friends come to call
But in truth their friend is gone
I’m just an image on the wall
 
 
 
 
 
 
About This Poem
I guess I wasn’t feeling so hot…

View On WordPress

NaPoWriMo2015 Poem 8: I’m Not Here

CN: self-deprecation, dreadful self-esteem, negative self-talk, whatever you want to call it.

I’m Not Here

Dull as dirt & with less life
Lazy, lazy, ill at ease
Striving, failing, full of strife
& of Pyrrhic victories

I’m not in, I’ll be anon,
Say I when friends come to call
But in truth their friend is gone
I’m just an image on the wall
 
 
 
 
 
 
About This Poem
I guess I wasn’t feeling so hot about myself and my lack of poetry updates so I wrote a poem to yell at myself about it? It’s not even a good poem, frankly. The meter is off and although I like the rhyming of “ease” and “victories”, I’ve always thought rhyming “life” and “strife” is somehow cheap. Also I came up with the title literally just now while I was typing up the poem, so it’s not an ideal title, either. Critique is welcome: if there is a way to shine this dross, I’d be most grateful.

NaPoWriMo2015 Poem 7: On Actually Looking At A Tree

I’m a little behind on posting these up (writing them, too, but more so on the posting) so here’s three all at once.

On Actually Looking At A Tree For The First Time In Ages

The deep green stirs something in Lide
that lay dormant in the winter months–
Ve cannot tear verself away from
street-facing windows, second-story windows
in line with tree branches, black with aliveness.
Lide rests vis hands…

View On WordPress

NaPoWriMo2015 Poem 7: On Actually Looking At A Tree

I’m a little behind on posting these up (writing them, too, but more so on the posting) so here’s three all at once.

On Actually Looking At A Tree For The First Time In Ages

The deep green stirs something in Lide
that lay dormant in the winter months–
Ve cannot tear verself away from
street-facing windows, second-story windows
in line with tree branches, black with aliveness.
Lide rests vis hands on the sill, fingers
splayed.
Lide curls vis toes under, balancing, steady,
measures the jump with vis eyes.
Ve has been grounded for half the year.
The green leaves beckon, faces up to the sun
towards flight.
Awe transfixes ver. Ve is so enticed ve can’t move.
Later, ve will climb, limbs stretching, pulling, grasping.
Now, ve gazes, savors, feeling the wild inside ver wake.
 
 
 
 
About This Poem
I started writing this when at The CONVERSATION, a multimedia performance event curated by the inimitable Storm Garner. Wrote the first two lines and then couldn’t simultaneously continue and pay attention to what was happening around me, so I left it at that until the next day. Lide is another character who somehow ended up in the universe of the Caras poems; ve first showed up as the subject of the poem “Bearing Witness”, which I may post up here someday. On a more personal note, I’ve been delighted by the advent of spring and the greening of trees all around the city. It brings me hope. 🙂

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